Nights After "Wave Nights"

Rainy days are my favorite. Rainy sunsets and warm nights are even better.
You know when some nights feel super magical? And everything is esthetically pleasing?
Tonight is that night.

Even though last night/day was awful. It was one of those nights I affectionately call:

"wave nights"

What's a wave night?
It's like the feeling you get when you're swimming in the ocean. It can happen even when you think you are pretty safe up on the shore. The waves crash down on you with such force that you get flipped around and water inevitably goes up your nose. That's the key; water up your nose. You know, that super uncomfortable feeling you get with salt water up your nose. Your eyes would be watering if the salt water wasn't already nestled quite comfortably in them causing a surge of pain and a stinging sensation.
Or how about the feeling you get when you dive into the water and don't plug your nose? It injects itself with such velocity up your nose that you shoot straight out of the water.
Either of those descriptions may do.
When I get hit with nights like last night (which happen about once a month, around the 26th, I've tracked them). I just feel like I can't tell up from down. It's like I'm swirling around after being hit by a crushing wave. Thoughts are swirling, emotions are raging, and I can't do anything but cry. It's actually really debilitating (Right about now is when you start to think I'm a nut case) ha.

So anyway, tonight is a bit different. The wave passed. I held on tight, I called a friend, I talked to Jesus, I cried, I got through it.

It reminds me of the scripture in Exodus (I've been loving that book) that talks about when the Israelites were being led and Pharaoh was CHASING them. (I understand this sentiment)

But the Israelites went through the sea on dry ground, with a wall of water on their right and on their left.

Here the Israelites are, being chased by the most powerful man they know, with whom they have formed a quite unhealthy relationship with for years and years as slaves, following God while he does crazy things unimaginable like part the SEA for THEM...and they are provided with a nice, dry ground to walk on. They didn't even have to walk through muck. But just imagine the feeling they must of had when they either looked to the HUGE wall of water on their left and right (that could come down on them at any moment if God wasn't who He said He was) or the army raging behind them. The only option they really had is to continue forward and to only look forward.

Back to tonight. So tonight I'm sitting on my porch, with paper lanterns lit above me, Patsy Kline on grooveshark (reminds me of my grandma) and having a glass of wine. Nights like tonight I'm reminded I'm on dry ground. Even with walls of emotion on my left and wrong thinking on my right, I'm still victorious.

And I love rain. I love how it washes everything. I love how it makes rainbows. I love how it lets you sit inside. I love how it lets you dance in it. I love how it makes puddles to splash in. I love how it smears your mascara and makes your hair a hot mess.

But most of all, I love nights after the "wave nights". When you are reminded the sun still comes up, that you will be OK, that you are winning the battle, that things still are beautiful, that housemates come home and make dinner, that friends will talk to you late at night when you are balling, that truth defies emotions, that Jesus really is good, and that within 24 hours Jesus can give you one of your favorite things-a beautiful, thunderstormy, sunset, warm, rainy night. Because He knows your hearts desires. And because He's proud of you.

Walk on that dry ground while your enemies are crushed behind you.

xoxo
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